DOWN TIME: SITTING IN THE DOCTOR’S OFFICE

There I was waiting to be seen and feeling anxious. Not because of the appointment, but because I had so many other things to do. And then I remembered the most important one was to stop and take care of myself.

As a mother (a working mom to boot) I am part of an ever increasing group of women who put everyone and everything else first. I worry about everyone else in my family eating right and getting enough sleep. I make sure they all keep their doctor’s appointments. I encourage them to take a vacation, make time for friends and pursue hobbies.

But me – well that’s another story. I always feel like I am on a treadmill, running from one task to the next – one place to the other. I seem to remember there is an off switch, but can’t bring myself to push it. My down time consists of cooking healthy meals, shopping for ingredients and other household needs, and taking the dog to the vet. Wait !!! That’s not down time. Let’s try again – my down time involves baking, sharing a meal with family or friends (not always restful) and reading (which is frequently done in 30 minute intervals on the subway on the way to work). I love sleeping – although often my dreams are of work and life related and very real – so not always rejuvenating or down time. Truly, my down time has become watching a favorite TV show, doing a crossword or jigsaw puzzle and writing this blog.

Life gets in the way. Work to be done, family to check in on (visits, calls and emails) and pets to care for. My parents raised me to be responsible, confident and independent. I am a hard worker and my work ethic is strong. I am a good friend.  I go to the doctor and dentist when needed. Not always as quickly as I should, but I get there. I encourage all my friends to take care of themselves and get frustrated when they don’t.  I can do this. If I don’t take care of myself, who will?

Kathy Ann Brodsky, LCSW is a social worker, adoptive mom and advocate for ethical adoption practice. She has prepared thousands of adoption homestudies, counseled adoptive parents and parents-to-be, and has trained professionals to work with adoptive families. She was named an “Angel in Adoption” by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption in 2001 and has a private practice in New York City. She is also Director of the Ametz Adoption Program of JCCA. She can be reached at theadoptionmaven@gmail.com