While not a major holiday Valentine's Day is one of the heart. Store windows are filled with heart displays and commercials are filled with loving moments between family members. Flowers and chocolate are flying off the shelves. For those already parenting, receiving a valentine from a child is heartwarming and reassuring. But for those still waiting, the day can be another reminder of time one by and a dream that is not yet fulfilled.
As with any other holiday or social gathering time, recognize what you are feeling and be kind to yourself. Perhaps you want to dedicate the day to your hopes and dreams and the thought that next year you will be celebrating with your child. You might also want to consider if there is something else you can do to move your parenting dreams forward.
Recognize that there is no need to celebrate if you don't want to. Just alert those closest to you that it is a holiday you're going to let pass.
Someone famous once said the heart wants what it wants. Whether you want to be a parent or you are a parent already, this is something you've wanted and waited for, for a long time.
Adoption does make dreams come true. On this Valentine's Day hold onto those hopes and dreams.
Kathy Ann Brodsky, LCSW is a New York and New Jersey licensed social worker, adoptive mom and advocate for ethical adoption practice. She has prepared thousands of adoption homestudies, counseled adoptive parents and parents-to-be, and has trained professionals to work with adoptive families. She was Director of the Ametz Adoption Program of JCCA (March 1992 to March 2015), Head Writer for Adoption.net and a member of the Advisory Board for POV’s Adoption Series. She is currently a member of the Adoption Advisory Board of Path2Parenthood and active in the Adoptive Parents Committee in New York (including being the 2016 Conference Keynote). She lives in New York City where she has a private practice specializing in adoption and adoptive parenting. She was named an “Angel in Adoption” by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption in 2001. Follow or reach her at ADOPTION MAVEN BLOG or EMAIL
