A TOUGH MONTH

I certainly had time this month to blog, mostly working from home, but somehow couldn’t think of what to say. At the start of March 2020, I was meeting with singles and couples, doing homestudies and post placements, as well as helping birth parents think through or proceed with adoption plans. As the month progressed, and the coronavirus started to spread, direct meetings with clients moved to a video format.

This was a new venue for me. I have done video chats with family members and phone counseling calls with clients, but to do an interview of several hours via video took some getting used to. Normally on the days I work from home, I am writing reports and making phone calls. I don’t put on make-up and spend the day in very comfy yoga pants and a favorite sweater. Now, working from home took on a new meaning. Did I need to put on make-up? Get in business clothes (I am a casual person anyway)? Did I need to lock the dog in another room?

I decided to be me. I did put on make-up, combed my hair and made sure I had a nice top on (that was the part of me seen in the video screen). But I was always barefoot or in my comfy slipper socks. Often, the dog was near by or on my feet.

All video chats started with a few minutes of how we were all doing. What adaptations or accommodations were being made to work from home, continue in the workplace or adjusting to being laid-off. Some admitted the new “free” time was perfect for moving their adoption plans forward. They could collect documents; friends were more available to write reference letters and there was time to complete any needed adoptive parent training (via online resources).

New parents had mixed reactions. They were thrilled to be home with a new child, unclear how parental leave would be calculated. Others felt uncertain about when and how they would return to work or wanted to continue to work from home now.

I enjoy meeting with singles and couples at all stages of the adoption process, from just thinking about it through the homestudy process and after a child has joined the family. I continue to see the hope in the eyes of those just starting the process and am in awe of the adoptive parents whose determination and bravery, in light of the pandemic outbreak, to fly or drive long distances to bring home the babies they so longed for. As I delight in their accomplishments, I am saddened by the need to meet their new family member via video. Post placements were always the best part of the job.

While agencies and social workers grapple with how to handle new homestudies and document requirements in these uncertain times, I am pleased to have been able to adjust and find ways to help my clients move forward with family building.

My determination to help singles and couples see their dreams come true is stronger than ever. After all, being a part of any adoption journey is the best part of my day. Let me know how I can help.

Kathy Ann Brodsky, LCSW is a New York and New Jersey licensed social worker, adoptive mom and advocate for ethical adoption practice. Through her private practice and agency affiliations, she has prepared  thousands of adoption  homestudies, counseled  expectant, birth, pre/post adoptive parents and  adopted  persons, as  well  as trained  professionals  to  work  with  adoptive  families. She  was Director of the  Ametz  Adoption  Program of  JCCA and a member of the Advisory Board for POV’s Adoption  Series and the  Adoption  Advisory  Board  of  Path2Parenthood, She is currently a  Adoption   Professional   Advisory  Council  of  HelpUSAdopt , a member of the Advisory Board of the Family Equality Council and  active  in  the  Adoptive Parents Committee in  New  York.  Her  blogs  and  written contributions can be seen throughout the Internet, including  her  BLOG  and  as  Head  Writer  for  ADOPTION.NET   She  was  named  an  “Angel in Adoption” by the Congressional Coalition on Adoption in 2001. You can reach her directly.