At various stages of the education process, these assignments and discussions crop up. For an adopted child (and parent) the lessons can raise anxiety in their not being able to complete an assignment on a Family Tree. Do they need to reveal the adoption? Can they make up answers? Will they fake a stomach ache to stay home that day? How much sleep will you lose as the concerned parent? Should you talk to the teacher? How can you help prepare your child on what to say or how to answer questions from others?
In the early years, it is usually about a time line showing HOW MUCH I'VE GROWN (including a baby picture). This is most problematic for a child not adopted as a newborn or one that does not resemble other family members. How do they complete an assignment without that photo? How will they answer questions from peers? Should you as the parent talk to the teacher? And what about that parent, who many years ago, told me she cropped an infant's photo out of a magazine for her child's timeline and has felt bad ever since?
In elementary school, there are discussions of WHO IS IN MY FAMILY. By now your child should know a bit about their early history and how they became a member of your family. How do they view their birth parents and siblings (if any)? What do they call them? How rigid is the teacher or school about the assignment? Are their options for family formation depictions (trees, orchards, photos, etc.?) Is it up to the child to devise their family profile? How will you feel with birth family members included (or not included) in the family assignment? Can you discuss this with the teacher so that you understand their concept and share your views prior to the assignment? To do so, you will need to disclose the adoption.